3 decades ago, nature put me into the womb of a young, driven, determined Nigerian teenager in the suburbs of London. Upon the news of pregnancy she swiftly experienced the absenteeism of the male, who by me has still never been seen today. The feminine nature makes sacrifices for the good of the world and those who are beloved to her. The first of countless sacrifices she made for me was to drop out of college. If she was influenced enough by peers she may have terminated me. Though I didn't feel I contributed a massive deal to her anxiety, raising a son in the bustling capital is anxiety stricken itself. Life from then on became about survival and education. Do we have enough money to eat the next day; when will we next have enough money to replace old uniform clothes; is he getting good grades and improving at school?
Later in life she began having troubles with her mental health, which is a common occurrence amongst young black African women, more than we know. As I observed the phenomenon, at times the parent-child role dynamics switched. In many ways I became her supervisor from 7, and that meant I was forced to level up my maturity. Monitoring her regulated intakes of medicine sparked off curiosity in me about how the mind worked. As I walked the streets of London I started becoming more sensitive to people's minds and often wondered what sparked their behaviour.
During teenage years, I allowed the promise of financial independence and bliss through enterprise to sweep me into entrepreneurship. I studied Business from 16, joint-founded a company at 17, aspired to apply for Apprentice and Dragon's Den and traded gold, silver, aluminium, copper, lead, zinc and tin commodities. I was young, energetic and materially motivated. But little did I know my life was to change forever during a university freshers Fayre market day.
There were stalls upon stalls of various societies that I signed up for; African-Caribbean society, Football society, Badminton society, Law society, Christian society. . . I was collecting as many freebies as possible from each of the society's offerings. Stationery, vouchers, cards, you name it. I kept telling them all about my business, since I planned to take over my whole university with it!
During these sessions I came across two personalities named JD and Jay. We got into conversation and they offered to buy 25 pieces of merchandise from me. The conversation extended for an hour and they asked me a question. They asked me, what are all humans seeking? I said happiness. I'll never know what made me say that, as I hadn't ever read it before, nor been asked such a question. They said, "this person's smart". I felt appreciated. They invited me down to weekly Think Out Loud seminars, where I would then meet a student of the mentor of Nelson Mandela and Muhammad Ali. He took me on a journey of self-discovery I can never thank him enough for.
This personality was a powerful embodiment of wisdom, love, selflessness and generosity. He had sharp insight. He brought to the seminars with him a background of Eastern philosophy, Western philosophy, meditation, leadership, psychology, sociology, politics and economics. I hammered him with questions surrounding success, psychology, self-esteem, karma, religion, purpose, money, sexuality, globalisation and you name it! He answered the entire lot. There wasn't some theme the teachings of east couldn't deal with. And he even answered questions that I thought to myself, 'why wasn't I questioning that?'
He agreed to lend me a book that changed my perspective of my business pursuits, leadership styles and life in general: Leadership II: For an age of higher consciousness. At the end of the year he introduced me to the practices of breath control and mantra meditation. At first trying to meditate for me was a bit awkward. I did not realise how much my mind talks and tries to influence me to be active, until I tried to sit with it. As I dived deeper into the practice, it was profound, and enriched my life. What really sold me, is when I asked some of my friends and my partner to try it too. They had life changing experiences too. When something I do equally positively effects the hearts of those who I love, well, it captures me.
Wanting to truly realise the value of the teachings I spent all my savings visiting India 9 times to study, travel, meditate and soak up spiritual culture. I received a divinity diploma in essential eastern philosophy. I was committing career suicide. But I had faith that if this was real, and that the purpose of life and how to truly love had been revealed to me, things will work out in the long term. I met a whole host of gurus there and one would take me under his wing and teach me the Masculine-Feminine science. I was sold again. And another would allow me to travel with him for some time. As various people I met there saw my enthusiasm to share and present whatever I had been studying I was kindly invited to give workshops and seminars in countries like Nigeria, Ghana, Australia, New Zealand, Belgium and Italy.
Now I'm a relationship philosopher, masculine-feminine science teacher, yoga philosophy teacher, retreat host and speaker based in Australia and have currently helped thousands of people to let go, have successful relationships and discover themselves in universities, yoga studios, companies, schools and online. Contact me to work together and find out my workshop schedule